Sunday, June 21, 2009

The Ohnosecond

Are you familiar with the Ohnosecond? The smallest imaginable, indeed the smallest conceivable, unit of time. And remarkably uniform too. It's always (this never varies) the time between you realising you've done something and realising you really shouldn't have done it.

In my case it was hoeing straight through one of only three outdoor cucumber plants. I console myself that it was the puniest of the three (which isn't saying much; they'd all get sand kicked in their faces by Mr Gherkin, himself not the largest of cucumbers). But it was irritating and a classic Ohnosecond.

So what else is going on? Massive weeding, that's what.

See Janet, look at the tidy beans. See John, look at the tidy onions. See you Jimmie, if you eat those raspberries before me.

And look who lives on our lawn. Two of them actually.

And finally, and this trumps all, we are to be grandparents; a little girl due in September. We are of course delighted. Genetically, my work is done. Genes passed on and then passed on again. Gregor Mendel, where are you now?


The Gnome said...

I had to take double take, which is twice the length of an ohnosecond. Not only was I shocked to see a weedless allotment, but I needed the extra second to realise that you as a human are becoming a grandparent and that it was nothing to do with genetic mutations and the hegehogs.

Congratulations Woody !!

Susan said...

Hedgehogs are great, they look cute and eat up the slugs, you can't get much better than that can you? Oh yes, congratulations, I guess you can.

Woody Wilbury said...

Thanks both. Really looking forward to it.

mc55 said...

oh congratulations on your happy news x